


To meet the moon

by HolyEmpress



Category: Cardfight!! Vanguard
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-26
Updated: 2015-12-26
Packaged: 2018-05-09 14:19:49
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,976
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5543081
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HolyEmpress/pseuds/HolyEmpress
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Set after the end of Legion-mate.<br/>Gaillard dowloads the snapchat application to please his lord ; but quickly gets absorbed, in their wordless dialogue (and one picture is enough, to remind him about the person who's taught him the meaning of the word love).</p>
            </blockquote>





	To meet the moon

**Author's Note:**

  * For [leviadrache](https://archiveofourown.org/users/leviadrache/gifts).



It's a little surprising when Aichi ask him if he owns the  _ Snapchat  _ app on his phone.

It happens during one of their monthly phone calls – he never tries to ask for more, already thankful for even an hour of his time – and he answers that, no, he has no idea what Snapchat could even be to begin with.

(but he's interested, if it's something Aichi likes, off course)

_ « It's like chating… with pictures… since you don't like texting, I wondered if you'd rather maybe use this instead ? It's really fun. » _

He blushes at the mention his aversion for texts – out of shame. It had been difficult, in the beginning, to explain he wasn't really uncomfortable with that method of communication, and Aichi had laughed, made a comment about how cute and old-fashionned he was, and settled for the monthly phone calls.

(Really, he just didn't want to bother Aichi with his wordy, embarassing texts, but his  _ lord  _ doesn't need to know about that part)

_ « It's just an idea but I'll be really happy if you gave if a try… just to do what you're doing these days » _ Aichi concludes, in a tone he'd missed hearing, and it's settled – no matter how much technology resisted him, he was going to make it work this time.

  
  


He dowloads the app on his phone the next day – with the help of one of the children at the orphanage, who are just too eager to teach their big brother something new. They go over the features of the app together, and he choses the username – oliviergaillard, nothing fancy despite the kids insistance on picking something nicer, as if his own name isn't  _ nice enough.  _ Next step, they add Aichi as his first contact,  _ blaster-aichi,  _ he types thoroughly into the small window.

And it's funny, because it's so easy, but he doesn't feel at ease, not one second, even when the children start marveling at the fact that the great Aichi wants him as a friend on snapchat, and that maybe it could mean that he's going to visit them again soon, and,  _ say, big brother, wouldn't that be wonderful ? _

He brushes off the idea, smiling softly as he explains that their idol is a little too busy with school – and that they should work hard, too, to make him proud. The explanation seems to satisfy them, and they all nod as they promise to do their best to bring Aichi back.

He smiles – weakly, because he can't blame kids for not knowing how much it hurts, and how, really, it's his job to  _ bring Aichi back,  _ but he's too much of a coward to do it. He doesn't admit, either, how happy he is, settling for  _ second best,  _ photographs instead of the real thing, because the last thing these children need is too realize how pathetic the role model they had chosen for themselves really is.

The first picture he sends to him is a group shot of his family, with the most boring caption he can find, «they helped me with this thing » - he curses himself for being so dull and formal, even if he's really happy, deep down, with how his first snap turned out, because it's cute enough to make him smile, so maybe there's a chance Aichi will appreciate it too.

And he responds a moment later, as he's busy playing a few vanguard matches against his siblings. He interrumpts himself in the middle of his play to look at his phone, aware of the children observing him – and tries his best to keep a neutral face, as if he's looking at something really crucial and serious, but fails, ultimately, when he discovers Aichi's answer to his photograph.

It's a selfie – Aichi, giving the camera a thumbs-up, captioned « good job ! ». He's smiling, softly, the light from what seems to be his bedrooms window illuminating his light blue hair. He notices the desk in the background, crumbling under piles and piles of textbooks – and has time to do nothing else before the pictures disappears, but the memory of Aichi's face lingers his in mind for a few more seconds, until his little opponent interrupts his daydreaming.

\- Big brother, why are you blushing ? Asks the kid, staring at the vanguard field, more confused than genuinely suspecting of anything.

\- I'm not blushing, he answers in his most assertive tone.

It's a terrible lie – but, thankfully, his sibling accepts it and they move on with their match.

  
  


After a few days, he starts to ask himself what kind of demon could have invented such a cruel app.

It takes effort out of him to send snaps to Aichi – because, really, nothing's good enough, interesting enough in his life to warrant a picture, so he starts paying double the attention to his surroundings. Sometimes, it's a cute dog, sometimes, a new card, but he always manages to find something to send him everyday – he wants too, desperatly.

To not mess up his one chance to be close with Aichi again.

He doesn't always get a selfie in return – but it's always something good nonetheless, and he appreciates, the little things, knowing Aichi's got himself a new shirt, or a great mark on his exams, or made friends among the vanguard players of his campus. The joy outweighs the jalousy – for a few seconds, he's almost there. Almost reunited again.

And that why he feels  _ betrayed  _ by the apps time limit ; which reminds him that his bliss is an illusion and that he's still an hopeless idiot, unable to act on his feelings, even when it's so obvious, that he loves him.

That his heart races, when he indeed gets the selfie he always hope for - because Aichi is beautiful, indescribably so, and it pleases him to see his face, to see him  _ live  _ this life he'd sworn to protect, back then. He's not his lord anymore – at least, not officially – but he still feels bound to him, feels his duties, like the ghost of his old rings around his fingers, because he promised Aichi, and promises were forever, unlike  _ those stupid snapchats pictures. _

« I'm glad you're doing okay » he captions, after a particularly nice snap (the young boy doing a peace sign, holding an essay annotated with praiseful comments from his teachers), and what he means is  _ I'm glad you exist,  _ but it's still too soon to say it again. He has too learn to be casual, he knows. Being Aichi's knight, Aichi's loyal soldier has been much easier than just trying to act like  _ a friend _ \- but he wanted to get good at this.

Good enough for the person he loved the most to consider them  _ close  _ again.

 

\- You can save photos, you know, Kai tells him one night, as they're eating dinner in their shared appartment.

\- Pardon ?

\- You can save photos. On snapchat. It's simple.

He sounds  _ annoyed,  _ as if he's been holding back on doing him this favor for too long, and the fact that the remark is completly unprompted gets on the french boy's nerves – it means that Kai has been observing him, and that his distress was  _ obvious.  _ Obvious enough that Toshiki, king-of-indifference Kai Toshiki, ended up pitying him.

His roommate takes out his phone, and quickly shows him, how to capture a snap before it's gone. He doesn't bother commenting on the process – his generosity doesn't go that far, and he's probably thinking to himself  _ that he's doing him a favor,  _ putting an end to his misery like this.

He's not really wrong – but it's Kai Toshiki, so there was no point in praising him for that when the only reward would only be to see another of the smug smiles he already had to endure everyday.

\- You're not very subtle, Toshiki adds after putting his phone back into his pocket.

\- And you're an asshole, but I don't feel the need to comment on it everyday, don't I ? he answers, taking another bite out of his steak to put an end to the conversation.

He doesn't talk to him again before the next day – and, in exchange, Kai doesn't comment on the ridiculousness of being  _ vexed  _ about him noticing his obvious crush on their mutual friend.

 

\- Did you ever send pictures of me ?

\- Hm ?

It's not in his habits to talk to Kai during their vanguard fights – they're training for the european circuits, and chatter wasn't allowed during public battles. Kai raises an eyebrow, surprised – it's not exactly a question he'd expected from him, and, especially,  _ it doesn't really make sense out of context. _

\- On snapchat. To Aichi, he specifies, just so the imbecile doesn't get ideas.

He tries to maintain his cool – to pretend he didn't think about it too much in the past days, didn't reflect on the fact that Kai having the app on his phone meant  _ he wasn't the only one to share pictures with Aichi like this,  _ which was ridiculous, off course, because that was the whole point of things like this, to stay in contact with  _ friends,  _ and he was probably the abnormal one, having never bothered to add anyone else than Aichi even after all this time.

But if felt as if life was mocking him – because Kai Toshiki, ruiner of worlds, worst person on earth, was probably snapchatting with his friend on a daily basis too, effortlessly, making fun of him on top of that, and he couldn't do a thing to prevent it from happening.

\- What if I did ? The young man answers, utterly expressionless.

He seems deeply uninterested by the matter – or maybe he's just toying with him, it's hard to tell.

Because his question is a display of weakness of something he deeply dislikes about himself, his ignorance of what « normalcy » between friends really meant, and Kai loves to unnerve him, doesn't realize, that he's not really all that okay with it.

He wishes he could have had the desire to be close to someone  _ before  _ meeting Aichi, so that he could have had some experience, could have had an idea on how to impress him - instead of making a fool of himself like this.

\- If you did, you'll probably have to go sleep under a brigde tonight, he answers Kai with a smile – and drive checks a critical in the same go, to really put a close on the matter for the night.

 

Quickly enough, it's time for their monthly phone call again – and he rejoices at the sound of Aichi's voice, the only absence snapchat couldn't fill, smiles a little, because Aichi is the same as always, joyful, lively, and hearing him feels like coming home again, coming back to a place he belongs to. There's no awkwardness when he tells him about the events of the past month, and he finds himself getting carried away, sometimes, sharing details he wouldn't share with anyone else – expressing his  _ feelings _ , effortlessly. Maybe because Aichi encourages him, in subtle ways, because he's just too eager to answer to his questions, to say «  _ it made me happy too » _ when Aichi gets enthusiastic about the little details of his life, and he does that quite a lot, he notices.

It takes a while before Aichi mentions their snapchats exchanges – there's too much to catch up on, too many stories of what happened in the boy's ordinary campus routine he needs to hear first – but when he does, it's a pleasure to find out how much his friend has been enjoying it so far, how satisfied he is with his daily efforts, and really, he can't help feeling pleased with himself too. To be able to fufill his duty towards Aichi, even when they were miles apart.

But his heart shatters, when his  _ lord _ mentions the fact that, among the dozen of pictures he's managed to take, he had never, even once, sent a picture of himself – and it's even worse when he hears the concern in Aichi's tone, the slight hints of worry ( Aichi should never worry about him, he thinks, Aichi worrying about him meant he  _ failed _ , at  _ everything _ ) behind his question too.

« It wasn't easy for me at first too, but, really, there's nothing to be afraid of… since it's just between us, right ? » he adds, and he can almost hear the smile on Aichi's lips, that soft encouraging smile that had convinced him, months ago, that engaging himself to serve  _ that person _ forever was the right thing to do – so he pretends, pretends to be unphased, laughs along to the comment, off course, he wasn't afraid to send him a selfie, it's just that the idea had never occured to him before, that's all, and yes, he was going to try in the next month, he promises half-heartedly. Pretending in front of Aichi  _ hurts _ – but he does his best, to smile too, sincerely enough for the young boy on the other end of the line to hear him.

« You've never even made any comment about the bags under my eyes, after all » Aichi says, in a final attempt to rassure him, and he feels his smile grow a little more sincere – because Aichi doesn't realize, really, how beautiful he is, no matter the circonstance, unaware of the wonderful glow of his blue eyes, even when his eyelids where half-opened, and of the unique ways he had to  _ exist  _ so gracefully that, really, no eye bags in the world could ever manage to harm his charm.

And when they hang up, he's still smiling – but it takes a moment to accomodate to the silence again, to find his peace of heart, because,  _ Aichi isn't by his side  _ and it's hard to tell himself it's okay, even when he is, really, doing fine, while the missing part of his happiness was living on another continent, just not fine enough to resist his urge to cry at the thought that he was going to be alone again for a while.

But it's easy to cherish the memory of Aichi's voice – when he sees the notification on snapchat pop up sometimes later, and that just opening the app is enough to remember he's still linked, somehow, with the person he cherishes the most.

  
  


The next morning is a battle – against his hair, mostly, who refuse to cooperate with the brush, and he gives up after a minute and a half of trying to make the blue entity look better than usual. Looking « nice » would have to be sufficient.

He brushes his teeth once – and then a second time, just to be sure, because taking a selfie was going to be embarassing enough on its own, without some salad or ugly crumbs stuck in his smile to make it  _ worse.  _ Picking his outfit is the easy part – he's confident in his fashion sense. He choses a nice blue vest, just because he knows it's  _ his  _ favorite color, and it's already time for his first attempt.

He doesn't know why he's even trying to do something so unlike him – and doesn't really want to ask himself, why he went through the trouble of waking early, to make sure he could spend some time alone in the bathroom before Kai wakes up, just to take a stupid selfie.

And he lacks the courage to tell himself he's only doing this out of enthusiasm for the idea – since sending Aichi a great portrait of himself was the best way to do what he did best, obey him, and could, eventually, guarantee his place into Aichi's heart, because it's easier, easier to care about someone when you could see their face.

He can't really eat up his own lies – when it's so difficult, all of sudden, to smile in front of the mirror.

The first picture is atrocious ; the second, awful ; and the next thirty, just as bad. He resists the urge to throw his phone at the wall, after looking at his last try – a sinister selfie where his tie looks out of place, his eyes, duller than ever, and his expression just too awkward to even bother thinking he's gonna let Aichi see this one. He deserved something just as wonderful as him. Something better than  _ this _ .

_ Why would anybody waste their time like that _ , he thinks, browsing through his other attempts, and he bites his lips when he notices he's been at it for half an hour already and yet managed to achieve nothing worth of  _ his _ gaze.

Nothing was good enough for Aichi.

Nothing  _ about him  _ was good enough for Aichi, he corrects as he unlocks the bathroom door – to find Kai in the corridor, because, of course, there's still ways to add to his misery, to bury him just a little deeper, even after this selfie catastrophe – and life wasn't gonna leave him alone for one second.

Kai stares at him for a while – with the same atrocious morning stare he's gotten used to, the one he hates, because it always seems like he takes some time in the morning to register him as  _ the human being he pays rent to,  _ despite the fact that they've been tolerating each other for six months now, but he endures it, this time, hoping that seeing him already dressed up and ready for work at 6am is going to be interpreted as normal by Kai's sleepy brain.

\- Did you make breakfast ? His roommate asks, his priorities apparently in check, and it's annoying, really, that he can be so  _ careless  _ while he was so troubled.

And somewhat remarkable, that someone could maintain that insufferable aura from the moment he woke up to the one he went to sleep.

\- What do you think I am, your maid ? He answers, a little too agressively for the imbecile he lives with  _ not  _ to notice something's out of place this time.

But, thankfully, Toshiki doesn't care enough – and doesn't make a comments, when he slams the appartments door in what had to be his most dramatic exit in a while. 

 

It's too early to go to work, so he decides to take the metro to go to the orphanage – he knows that their door is always open for him, and somehow, on a day like this, seeing his family seems like a good idea, much better than just sulking in the streets of Paris until it's time for his first appointments of the day – with new sponsors he has no motivation to see.

The place smells like fresh croissants when he opens the door, and it pleases him immensely.

The few changes he'd brought to his home – his  _ true  _ home, unlike the flat he shared with Kai Toshiki – through ceaseless donations are enough to make him instantly happy, overjoyed with the fact that all the kids he cared about got to eat good breakfast, have fun in the orphanage's beautiful garden, and play with all the vanguard cards they ever wanted, no matter the cost. That none of them would ever feel like a burden on their caretakers finances – because there was place for everyone, in his great, big family, as long as he worked hard enough to provide for them.

The employees greet him, pleasantly surprised by his unexpected visit – most children are still getting dressed, they tell him, but they should be ready soon, so he can wait in the usual room they use for breakfasts.

Surprisingly, someone's already in there – and runs toward him as soon as he crosses the door.

\- Big brother ! A familiar voice yells.

He does the only reasonable thing to do in this situation ; lifts his little brother in the air, and draws him into his arm for a big hug, before putting him back, softly, on the ground. It's easy – and really, even if most of his friend wouldn't, ever, consider the word  _ affectionate  _ to describe him (and they're not  _ exactly  _ wrong) it doesn't take effort to answer his siblings tender gestures - because he loves them.

Just as much as he loves to be on screen, during the Europa league – knowing they're watching him, somewhere, just like other kids in need of inspiration in the world may be too, and that he's doing what he truly wishes for, fighting for  _ hope. _

( _ and giving Aichi a reason to be proud of his knight, maybe _ )

He takes a seat next to his little brother – Paul, the early bird of the house, he should have expected him to be up already – but the kid immediatly moves and decides to install himself on his lap, without asking for his opinion, and he smiles, again, the frustration from earlier completly gone.

Some things were way more important than his struggles to take a good selfie in the morning.

\- I'm so happy you're here ! the adults told us you were going to be busy with the Euro league for a while...

\- I thought it would be nice to share breakfast with you guys, you're a lot more fun than my roommate, he answers with a small laugh.

Paul laughs along – they all know Kai, from the times he'd forced him to pay them a visit (threathened him to send him back to Japan if he didn't do a good job as a Kagero legend, actually, but nobody had to know that) and from the stories he had told of their daily life together, thoroughly ruining any kind of reputation the fighter could have had.

Not that he genuinely minded Kai's company – he was far from talkative, apart from a few snarky remarks that were easy to brush off, and managed to hold good conversations when he was feeling up to it. It was just the fact that he, ironically, lacked warmth, struggled with the concept of  _ a smile  _ as well as the whole principle of  _ caring _ about others.

That's why it feels so much better to be here, too, in this wide, bright room, so welcoming – and an idea blooms into his mind, because the circumstances are perfects, now.

\- Paul...Do you think we could maybe, take a picture together ? It's for Aichi.

The child raises his head to give him a questionning stare.

\- He wants to know how we're all doing, he adds.

It's a small lie – a pretext he doesn't need to convince his sibling to play along, because, frankly, Paul seems already convinced, just something he wants to tell himself, to let go of the last bit of doubt in his heart.

He can't just  _ not  _ take this selfie after all - his previous failure were shameful enough, and the thoughts were not going to leave his head before he'd manage to achieve sucess.

Sure, it was just a stupid selfie, just as much as those were stupid, silly pictures he'd sent in the past months, but somewhere among the thoughtlessness – were his feelings, the stupid feelings he was determined to get through to Aichi.

Like the fact that his desires mattered to him – that, if he wanted to get a picture of his face, he wasn't going to discuss it, because the best way to show he cared was to just do it and never question why. 

\- Sure ! His brother answers enthusiastically.

He takes out his phone, takes a while to find a good framing, resists the urge to mess with his tie or his hair more than he already did for the day, and finally presses the button. It's only after the flash that he realizes he did not think about the facial expression he wanted to make.

It's a good picture.

  
  


They're both smiling wide, and he looks relaxed. It's also much more natural than the photos he had taken in the bathroom, and tells a different story too, because it's less about him  _ trying too hard to look good,  _ and more about his happy life with the children Aichi had managed to save from the threat of Link Joker back then.

Something he could actually care about.

 

The notification pops up, approximatly a minute later.

« Cute !! » with a smiley, says the caption, all over Aichi's beaming face.

 

The rest of the day goes by fast ; the appointment, wonderfully, because he's feeling confident, drunk with success and pride, and he catches himself smiling, everytime he remembers what he has accomplished. There's something thrilling about knowing that he pleased Aichi today, making of his little difficulties seem minor – he loses a few fights to Neve, and immediatly gets his winning streak back, thriving on the thought that really, nothing can resist him if he tries.

Kai notices, eventually, when he gets home, the difference – he has almost forgotten how they parted in the morning, his petty outburst, and pretends it never happened, just like the bathroom fiasco never did, too, because he's way too happy to bother with  _ Kai Toshiki  _ when Aichi existed and had enjoyed his silly morning selfie. He goes as far as to smile at his room mate during dinner, something he knows  _ exasperates  _ the japanese boy, because he can.

He has all the reasons in the world to smile (so what, if it's unsubtle after all).

 

But the relief only last a weeks – before a new picture of Aichi's face pops up on Snapchat and he realizes he has to do it again and he's used up his one good excuse not to take a picture of himself on his own. He stares at the selfie for a solid minute (he's gotten good, at saving the important stuff before the dreaded five-second ultimatum), reflecting on his stupidity.

Snapchat was an  _ exchange – _ he knows that picture of scenery sent from Aichi was an invitation to show him his own surrounding, pics of his breakfast, an indirect question about his last meal, and a selfie.

A selfie asked for another selfie back.

 

He bites his lip. Maybe, just that once, he could let this be an unequivalent echange, and he sends a picture of the room he's in, a very neutral, boring waiting room in one of his sponsor's building (nothing that could compare to Aichi's face – but he chases the thought, pushes away the guilt, he's not gonna manage a selfie this time) and decides to caption it « it's nice to have your company ».

He doesn't want to count this as a failure, even if it feels like it, cruely so – it's just a picture, he's in a profesionnal setting, it's almost as if he doesn't have to think for the list of excuse to come up by itself. Next time – he had until next time to figure out a solution.

But next times come ; he tries, goes through the painful bathroom routine again, fails, erasing a photo after another, because his face hasn't gotten better at smiling naturally in the meantime, and settles for compromises. It stars to feel wrong – dishonest, cowardly, as well as pathetic – but it's better than shame.

One day, especially, Aichi feels like sending him a picture of himself with bed hair, captioned simply with a good morning – one so beautiful, innocent and  _ intimate _ that he hesitates to save it (and before he manages to make up his mind, the picture is already gone), and that's when the guilt really starts downing on him, because the logical course of action is to send a selfie back. A natural one, to mirror Aichi's effortless charm. He doesn't even have to pose, try to look good, and he knows – it's just about doing it.

(Avoidance, off course, was really  _ always  _ about the unability to just do it.)

 

He tries. Out of love, sense of duty, or because, really, deep down, he wants to – he's unsure, but he points the camera at his face, smiles humbly (his experience of ugly selfies had at least taught him the way to make himself look  _ less horrible  _ and big smiles looked especially fake on him), but the result is the same as always. It's not bad, because through endless efforts, he made progress, had acquired some selfie skills, and knew a few good angle that flattered his eyes and toned down the awkwardness of some of his facial traits (he had heard that all people hated their noses, and he had never minded his until selfies revealed how much of an atrocity it was), but it's just not satisfactory.

He couldn't send this to Aichi – he couldn't handle the frustration of any success that wasn't  _ stellar  _ when it came to him.

He plays with the phone for a while, lets its roll around in his palm, twists it until he's ready to accept another failure, accept the fact that he's deeply uninspired too. Running out of stuff to show Aichi wasn't something he had anticipated at all, his life was, after all, pretty eventful, but still, he can feel it happening, coming closer, the day Aichi would come to realize he wasn't as great as he'd made himself out to be. Not that great – and pretty damn lonely.

He goes into the kitchen and takes a picture of Kai eating breakfast (or rather,  _ drinking  _ breakfast, more impassionated with his cup of coffee than the two toasts he'd barely touched). His roommate doesn't even protest, surprisingly at ease with this blatant violation of his privacy, and for once, he's thankful to be living with the human equivalent slug – it takes five more sips of coffee for Kai to ask what the picture is for. There's an hint of malice in his voice, but he accepts it, when he tells him it's for Aichi, without questioning further.

He settles on writing « Not everybody gets to look good in the morning » to accompany the snap. The joke doesn't make his discomfort go away – even when he leaves the house, his failure is still here, lingering in his thoughts.

And it stays.

 

The next days, when he receive a snap from Aichi, it's still there, even if he cannot find words describe to what  _ it  _ is exactly. Sadness was harsher, something that made him cry in frustration, so that couldn't be it – sadness, anger, joy, all those were normal feelings, but the thing that stays seems wrong, and it hurts him, he notices, notices how much he hates that sensation, when Aichi sends him a beautiful selfie and he doesn't even manage to smile, his mind already busy coming up with a solution to his inner conflict. It gets worse each time, to the point where Aichi's snaps were enough to ruin his momentum in a second – Kai, Neve, even Rati (who he only gets to talk to through Skype, these days) end up remarking the change too, but they don't provide any help making the problem go away.

Things that stayed not mattered how much he wanted them gone – that was the very definition of issues, he had learned this much after his third week of agony.

He doesn't ask for anyone's support though – as Aichi's knight, it's only right for him to search the answer on his own, to prove himself worthy.

 

(It stays.

Stays until it's time to call Aichi again.)

 

He's alone in his appartment when dials the familiar number – Kai's out, for whatever business he has to attempt to. That's comforting – at least, his roommate wasn't going to get in the way of this discussion.

Aichi answers the phone within a second. His muscles are still tense, but he eases up a little when the person he cares about so much greets him with the simplest «  _ hello  _ ». Simple – Aichi was much less complicated than him.

Everything about his lord makes sense, stars aligning in a perfect constellation, a wonder of nature – and the thought doesn't help, because if Aichi was the nightsky, infinite, beautiful beyond what mankind could comprehend, he, however, was nothing but a simple man, stuck on this prison called earth.

And the distance between them was greater than just an ocean and the price of a plane ticket to the USA – he was lightyears away. Lightyears away from being good enough.

They talk. It's almost the same as usual – except for his difficulties remember all the anecdotes he wanted to tell him this month. His memory is wonky and he knows why. His attention had been directed at something else, preventing him from  _ fully  _ experiencing anything for a while. Good fights, bad fights, he tells Aichi about those, emotionlessly, gives him a few news about Kai too. Every story he forces himself to narrate again is a struggle.

He feels himself grow impatient.

He's just waiting for Aichi to mention all the selfies – it's foolish to hope the young boy hasn't noticed at this point. Aichi wasn't stupid – actually, he was pretty sure he was much, much smarter than him. The frequency at which he had sent him pictures of himself in the past week proved it - he was trying to force him out of his avoidance, one way or another, awaiting the moment he would grow tired of finding excuses and just start reciprocating his selfies out of weariness.

At least, that was the conclusion he had come to.

Eventually, the topic pops up – but he barely pays attention to what his lord says. This conversation had happened to many times, in the theather of his own mind, for him to care anymore, though Aichi's voice is precious, charming, everything he'd dreamed of, the words go through him. It's odd - suddenly, he's just too aware of the emptiness around him and nothing feels real. The nothingness in the room echoes with the thing in his chest.

The thing that had stayed for too long.

( _ the self-hatred, consuming his heart from the start _ )

\- Aichi ? He interrupts him.  

It's hesitant, but Aichi stops immediatly. It's almost funny – Aichi knew, that he respected him too much to ever cut him in the middle of the sentence, yet, there he was. His standards lowered enough to act so shamefully in front of him. Hoping he could make it quick, because really, it was too hard.

He's shaking – ah,  _ pathetic -  _ and closes his eyes. It's too late to back out, he has to say it now.

Express his true feelings.

No matter how ugly they were.

\- Why do you do this ?

The frustration in his voice is just too obvious – pathetic, and shameful.

_ (If Aichi was the nightsky – he was the fool, yelling at the moon for answers to his own human doubts) _

\- Do what ? His lord asks softly, on the other end of the phone.

Instinctively, he clenches his fist, because Aichi sounds anxious and confused – the last thing he wanted to hear, really – and that's the only way to hold the self-hatred in, to avoid bursting.

But the mistake's already done.

_ (He’s a fool, so he has to keep yelling, to cover the fury of his own thoughts) _

\- Why do you insist ? He says, too loudly, in a tone that only shows  _ exasperation _ , and then immediatly puts his hand in front of his mouth, out of shock.

Yelling at Aichi – it was unthinkable, and yet, he had just done it. Out of rage and frustration, of fatigue, too, and if he doesn't like himself, then he has no reason not to do all these terrible things anymore, he realizes. He couldn't hold himself to the high standards that would have made him worthy of Aichi, so the only situation is to let the pain flow. Maybe it was Aichi's fault, for torturing him like this. Insisting was still too nice of an euphemism, in the end, and it's even more obvious when the young boy speaks again.

\- I'm not sure I understand, he says, and it's frustrating – maddening, even.

Because he's pretty sure he loves him, deeply, but it doesn't make the sentence less horrible, the pain less real, and the tears drier, as they start rolling down his cheeks. He had been humiliated in the past. Beaten down to the point were he couldn't get up anymore – had learned, how to handle helplessness, time after time, but talking to Aichi like this just felt like standing under a downpour without an umbrella.

He couldn't the raindrops from falling down – just as much as he was unable to run away from this, so he speaks again, achingly.

\- I just don't get why you… why you would care about seeing my face. Or … anything I send you, really… I don't see …

( _ it's freeing, but Aichi's silence on the other end of the phone throws him off – he expected him to care, at least a little) _

\- How you could be interested…

He interrupts himself – this wasn't an easy sentence to finish, and he swallows his tears. They taste like defeat, and he thinks, amusingly enough, that this would make a much more interesting picture to send Aichi, immensely superior to all his failed selfie, his ugly face distorted not by the camera's objective but by his deep anguish – a work of art, really.

\- In someone as uninteresting as me, he continues, I appreciate your efforts to treat me like…

A smile finds his way on his lips.

\- Like a friend, but it's okay. You don't have to waste time on me. The phone calls are… are enough.

He chokes on his last tears, wipes them off his cheak, takes a deap breath – slowly, comes back to his senses. Aware of his surroundings again – he stares at the windows, and it appeases him, to see the sky on the other side. He's not quite sure if he's looking in the right direction (maybe the USA were the other way entirely), but he feels peaceful.

It's gone, finally.

Or at least he thinks so.

Until he hears Aichi trying to hold back a sob.  

\- Gaillard…

He waits – time's suspended, for a second.

\- I'm really sorry if I made you uncomfortable… that really wasn't…

_ Your intention _ , he completes internally, because Aichi's unable too – he's crying, holding the phone away from his mouth so he doesn't hear, and he tries to ignore the muffled sound that's bringing out his own tears again. What a selfish monster he was – and an hypocrite. As a knight, his duty was to protect his lord.

Not to make him suffer like this.

Aichi takes a while before speaking again, slowly, calmy – but the words are wet, tainted with remorse.

\- I just thought it was obvious… that I missed you, that's all.

He lets out a small, uncomfortable laugh.

A laugh that hits him like a slap in the face.

If Aichi … missed him, he was much worse than a fool, and it meant so much, so many he hadn't even considered. In his stupidity, he had tried to brush away the fact that Aichi cared, closed in eyes in front of obvious proofs, and when the young boy speaks again – painfully – it's only to confirm his thoughts.

(his own mind is a mess – how hard it was, trying to think, when the fact that he's horrible is messing him up within)

\- Since we haven't seen each other face to face in so long, I thought a selfie would be nice.

It's obvious, now – and the image burns itself into his eyes, the picture of his lords bitter tears as he had to spell it out, say it out loud, that he's more than nothing to him, and he understands, of all the sudden, all the signs he had missed. A selfie – almost everyday, just for him, to spare his knight the sadness of forgetting the allure of his face, his delicate traits, and he had to wonder, if Aichi was starting to doubt himself, to wonder how he  _ really  _ looked. His memories of their time together were far and few

(On the moon, his eyes had remained closed before the very end).

\- Nicer than checking vanguard blogs hoping to see a picture of you pop up, Aichi confesses and the pain sinks deeper into his chest.

His voice, so pure, sounded regretful, almost as if he was ashamed, despite the fact that he could never judge him for indulging into something so human, so understandable when he had refused him the selfies he wanted.

Stupid, meaningless selfies.

(but it meant everything)

(that he wouldn't even let Aichi enjoy the smallest thing about him)

\- Is there anything else you want to talk about ? I'm listening. Anything...

The desperation in his tone is hard to withstand. Aichi wasn't supposed to get desperate, ever again. Having saved the world twice, he deserved boundless joy.

Lying would have been an insult to his efforts.

There was a question, indeed, he’d been avoiding for a while, but thankfully, it’s too late to be prideful.

(maybe it’s gonna make him smile)

\- Could you please … start using my first name ? He asks, finally.

\- Off course.

He’s the one who ends up smiling, for a second, because he can almost hear him nod on the other end of the line, rejoicing after hearing such a simple request. 

\- Do you want me to call again tomorrow ?

It's funny, how Aichi's the one to ask the question, to take responsability for his mistakes, even now. He only has to oblige, to follow the easy orders, and he feels like his lord is doing him a favor by adaptating to what he knows reassures him. Simple yes-no choices. Exercising his free will in the most restrictive ways, suffering from guilt everytime he was asked to display some selfishness.

Just like he used to, back at the orphanage.

_ What do you want for Christmas, Olivier?  _

_ Anything. _

_ Anything’s not an answer !  _

_ Then anything you think is best.  _

\- If you don't mind.

\- Not at all.

He's still kind, even after all this, because he’s Aichi, off course - no one else, in the entire universe, held such strength within their heart. The power to forgive - he knows he’s the only one genuinely mad. His lord’s attitude is entirely different.

He’s trying to fix things already.

Attempting to…

_ To save him from the darkness of the sick feelings he’d shown him. _

\- Goodnight, Olivier.

It sounds so nice when he says it. He tries to match. To make his voice sound nicer too, before he hangs up.

\- Goodbye, Aichi.

His mistakes ruins it.

  
  


He waits and - breaks the glass of water that was waiting on his nighstand. It's stupid, but he enjoys the violent noise, that and seeing the shards, oddly glimmering under his bedside lamps light. Kai, in the room nearby, doesn't even bulge – it was a normal thing for him, to let out his frustration in such childish ways.

The glass deserved to be broken, he thinks, for being so utterly terrible at making the water shine, but he's left with a feeling of emptiness once he's done sweeping the remnant of his outburst. There's nothing left to do –  _ as if  _ his mind could stop obssessing over what had just happened.

He decides to go to bed.  _ Olivier,  _ he hears again when he closes his eyes.

He cries himself to sleep, quietly – the pain gets duller, and his room mate doesn't knock on his door to ask  _ what the hell is wrong with you this time,  _ so finally manages to get some rest.

(but forgetting is what he would have truly wished for)

 

When he wakes up, Aichi has already sent him a few snaps – but he doesn't answer. He doesn't go to work, either. Kai sighs as he closes the door, without a comment ; he knows he's being judged, for being sad, pathetic and, once again,  _ unsubtle,  _ but it's too hard, too hard to actually care about it now that it's too late.

He stays in bed – with a book, the only escapes he finds to his negative thoughts. He had never been a very dedicated reader, but sometimes, stories were enjoyable, diving into unreachable fantaisies helped, somehow. It's time well-spent – better than it would have been at work, angrily trying to survive through the day.

At lunch, he eats the leftovers from one of Kai's good meals – rice and vegetables and a lot of things he can't really distinguish, but it tastes nice, overall, almost comforting, and being able to take care of himself feels like a small victory. He hesitates, for a second, reaches for his phone. It's the perfect chance to give Aichi a sign, to let him know just how well he's handling the aftermath of their conversation. Kai's food looks lovely, almost straight out of a health magazine.

He puts his phone back into his pocket, though – because it's pointless, because there was no way in the world he was going to turn into one of these people who took pictures of their food, oblivious to the fact that nobody cared. The last thing he wants to do, really – become something worse than who he already was.

Which is also the reason why, a few seconds laters, he takes out his phone again.

Because has to try, to start doing things - on the assumption that Aichi cares anyway.

« Kai needs to learn about pasta », he captions. It's not very funny – or, rather, it doesn't pass the test for what he'll consider sending to Aichi usually, but it's more sincere too. More genuine than trying to find the most neutral way to say « I'm eating and not enjoying it in the least » for the next ten minutes. He forces himself to smile.

Small steps – were still steps forward, nonetheless.

And his gesture held meaning ; it was  _ hopeful,  _ something he wouldn't have allowed himself to be in such a situation in the past. A sincere effort on his part to believe Aichi could love him, no matter how stupid and unfit he was for any kind of romance.

He's rewarded in the next hours – checks the picture immediatly when he gets the notification.

« Would you rather be eating this ? » in front of what appears to be a pile of candy – survivals rations for Aichi's extreme studying sessions, and he feels something warm and comforting in his chest as he stares at the photograph – god, Toshiki wasn't half-wrong when he called him an idiot. He really was, madly in love with the boy who texted him from across the ocean. Enough for  _ nothings  _ like these to mean everything to him. Enough that he'd allowed his whole life to revolve around the proofs of his existence, the signs that showed someone as perfect as Aichi wasn't just a dream but a beautiful, incredible reality.

And it was even more stupid of him to pretend he didn't want to be loved back, too. Cared for and loved. He wanted to get the chance, to be held in Aichi's arms, at the end of the day, because it seemed like the most wonderful experience in the world.

A chance that wasn't going to come all by itself – he had to say it, so he spends the rest of the day taking a few more snaps, better one, to catch up on all the time he had wasted, hiding himself behind a chivalrous façade. He wanted Aichi to know, about the potted plants he had put outside his window to make up for the uninteresting view, about his collection of old books and comics from his childhood. Putting the self-conscious thoughts aside – how narcissistic, delusional of him it was to believe someone would pay attention to the detail of his life or his useless comments – he keeps photographing everything, from Kai's ever-messy room (« this the worst roommate ever ») to his binder of vanguard cards, showing the one he loves the most, for various reasons - « this is a gift from my siblings », « this was the reward for the first europa circuit », and more. He tries not to leave anything out, and it keeps him busy for a very long time – flooding Aichi's snapchat with notifications, probably, and Kai seems even more perplexed than usual when he comes back to see him lying on the couch, completly exhausted.  _ You've had an eventful day,  _ he comments, and as alwas, it's impossible to tell his sarcasm apart from his sincerity, so he smiles,  _ to spite him,  _ because, indeed, he'd enjoyed his adventurous day off.

The feeling of the wounds in his pride, on his heart, starting to heal, his restored confidence – he was himself, fully, excessive in his actions, and most of all, trustful of the person he'd sworn to serve. All that was left for him was to wait for the call.

Both anxious and impatient – and he picks up to quickly, once he hears his ringtone.

\- Aichi… he starts immediatly, I'm sorry for y..

He interrupts himself, when he realizes he'd ridiculized himself again, succumbing to his strong feelings – and the fact that he wanted, more than anything, to be forgiven for his foolishness of the previous day, to make up for the harsh words he'd said, meant, and understood too late why they were wrong.

But as always – he's not the one in the lead,

\- Olivier.

As always, his name resounds, echoes in the silence they share for a second.

(he's dying with anticipation, counting the seconds to the rythm of his lords breath through the phone)

\- It's fine, Aichi finally declares.

Not much.

But it's enough to make him feel acquitted of his crime– something small, and something huge at the same time, just like the moon in the nighsky. Impactful enough to outshine the stars. He smiles, his eyes slightly watering – his close friends all knew, how easily he ended up crying, when faced with what he considered to be  _ beautiful.  _ Victories he was proud of, love, in all of its forms.

Gestures of forgiveness.

\- Instead of apologizing… maybe you should try telling me about your day ?

_ But you already know everything _ , he protests internally, touched, by the sweetness of Aichi's tone, his effort to be casual in spite of the circumstances, and maybe, indeed, gravity was unnecessary at the moment, and Aichi was so encouraging, in every single way. Strangely enough, what seemed so hard in the past few months looks so easy right now.

There's something radiant about  _ being sincere. _

\- I thought of you, he blurts out, out of ideas – even if that's the truth, really.

On the other end of the line, he hears – the beautiful laugh he'd longed for, as he was taking those pictures during the afternoon, the constellation he'd tried so hard to see, in that mysterious nightsky, taking the shape of Aichi's trust.

\- See, we share a few hobbies already, he says joyfully before asking, what more did you do then ?

 

Their call lasts longer than usual. Somehow, there's a lot more to tell, about this single day – because Aichi's forcing the details out of him, carefully asking questions that trick him into endless rants. He gets carried away, or maybe it's the other way around, and he's carried by his lords attention.

He notices, the subtle callbacks to the pictures he'd sent him today – but lets go, of his urges to overanalyze everything, to ask himself why the potted flowers caught his attention over the comic books, because there's no hidden meaning to seek.

It's just sincere interest – and interest was selective, so it turns out to be pleasant, to learn what Aichi loves the most about his existence.

When he runs out of breath (he's been talking  _ too much  _ for his weak constitution and already tired voice), he hears Aichi smile – somehow, it's something he can recognize without seeing it with his own eyes – before interrupting him, in the simplest way,  _ I think you should rest, Olivier,  _ following with the nicest _ I'll call again next morning, right ?  _ That leaves him speechless. Maybe because it's the equivalent of living three entire months in three days – a privilege, and now that he knows him better, he realizes it might not be a coincidence, that his lord had stopped him halfway through his anecdote. It's a great excuse.

And the next day, the young boy insists again, stopping himself mid-story - « I'll tell you the rest later » - and that's how the circle starts. Its becomes a routine, after the first week – they end the call on a  _ talk to you tomorrow  _ that works as well as an unsaid promise. What he has wished for, for months, finally happens – he calls Aichi everyday, asking himself why he hadn't done it sooner, because it's so much fun, and it improves his life immensely.

He smiles more, yells less – a feat, considering the person he's living with.

His siblings point it out, too, whe he visits them – _big brother,_ _are you in love ?_ They ask candidly, and he smirks, patting their head. He was in love, for sure.

(but it wasn't painful anymore.)

 

Aichi seems to enjoy it as well.

It's only after the second month that he starts mentionning the possibility of seeing each other again – he's doing wonderfully in his studies, off course, and the yearly break for the european tournament was coming soon, so it would be a perfect time for them to meet. The topic comes up more and more often – he lets Aichi do the planning, to make sure he's not forcing him into this, and quickly enough, the young boy gives him a date.

It's real and concrete. He puts a big, red cross on his calendar – old-fashionned, he thinks, amused, as he does it – and waits impatiently, catching up on all the silly sentimental stuff he had never gotten the chance to do in his teenage years, taking too much time in clothing shops to find the outfit, getting a first haircut, then a second one to fix the previous one, and sleeping way too little. The whole adventure is thoroughly documented through snapchat – now he's sure, that Aichi cares about his silly life, so he enjoys it all he can (but remains careful, not to spoil him some of the surprises, after he redecorates his place with his favorite flowers – pure white roses).

 

The day before Aichi's arrival, he spends maybe a little too long cleaning his appartment – and longer, even, negociating Kai's leave.

\- So I'm really gonna have to sleep under a bridge just for your romantic life to get somewhere, hm ? His roommate complains, grimacing as he packs his bags.

Except he's not fooling him – for Kai Toshiki to make such a long and elaborate sentence, required him to be in an exceptionally good mood. He asks himself, if the moron could even be  _ glad  _ for him, if emotionless and uncaring Kai Toshiki was able to  _ rejoice  _ at the thought that he had managed to get his disastrous love life back together from the pits of hell.

\- Well, you can resume ruining my life next week, you know, he answers, nicely, handing him a paper with the adress of the especially cosy hotel – that asshole wasn't gonna settle for anything less- he had booked for him.

\- Until you kick me out, Kai insists, but he senses the joy behind his grumpy facade as he reads out the hotel's adress and finishes packing his two bags.

 

Sleeping proves to be difficult ; he's impatient and stressed. It's too late to call Aichi, who's in the middle of his preparative at the moment. His plane was scheduled to arrive around seven AM, and they had discussed at lengths what they were going to do after that. He had a reservation for breakfast in a fancy hotel – it was the only plan Aichi had allowed him to make for them, arguing they should try to be «  _ spontaneous » _ in their adventures.

_ I know you, if I let you, you're gonna time every thing to the minute, right ?  _ He had said, with the adorable laugh he'd grown so used to.  _ Fine. As long as you're happy, I won't interfere with my … unspontaneous plans,  _ he'd conceded, making a mental note to cancel the other two restaurants he'd called earlier.

_ That's just like you,  _ Aichi had concluded, and only now he understands what he meant.

He stares at the ceiling for a while, mentally listing all the little things his lord knew about him now. How he was the type of person who learned every song on the radio in an instant, who loved to feel  _ important  _ but would still drop his decisive meetings when his siblings got sick, a moron who got angry just to end crying minutes later – someone who had a hard time knowing what he wanted.

But he's okay with it, now – all these flaws he'd agonized over.

If Aichi loved his ridiculousness - then there was something valuable about being a fool.

 

He sleeps well enough, this night – gets dressed quickly in the morning, and everything about the routines seems a little more pleasing, somehow. He doesn't hesitate, when he's done doing his hair in the bathroom, to take out his phone.

The selfie is pleasing to look at, and he feels  _ handsome,  _ for once _ – _ almost regretting his roommate's absence, because, sincerely, he would have paid to see Kai's annoyed face in front of his attractive looks.

(That idiot didn't have the monopoly on being unsufferably good-looking.)

 

He takes the metro to the airport, which takes fourty tedious minutes, finds the place where he has to wait, and sits on an uncomfortable bench. There's a few store opened, even at this early hour, but there's nothing he wants to.

Fatigue and stress were catching up to him.

It seemed unreal, that Aichi's plane soon would land. He's been to his country before, off course – so long ago, to ask for his help, but at that time, the sky was much more gloomy, shining with a much different glow from the bright blue he could admire by the airports bay window. Since then, his lord had made his life better, shinier and he was ready to welcome that light again – to stand under his very own glittering sun.

He gets nervous when the terminal is announced – it's only a matter of minutes, and he walks slowly to the place he's supposed to wait at. It's impossible to pretend he's not nervous, or that everything is under control, but he's learnt from the past few months how much his lord loved to see him overwhelmed - « it brings out your charming side », he'd say, as he was struggling to find the right words or trying to make up for his slip-ups (and he slipped up quite often – it was hard, to keep his composure faced with Aichi's adorable laugh).

At least, he had a charming side to show to the person who was so close to arriving right now.

 

He notices him just a second after reaching the baggage-claim area. He can only see his back, but it's him, from the beautiful white jacket he's wearing (the same he's seen in numerous pictures – it's weird, but he's starting to know Aichi's favorite clothes by heart) and the short, messy bedhair he's sporting (someone must have taken a well-deserved nap on that airplane). He's radiating with an aura he can't describe – it's almost soothing, to just stand within respectable distance of  _ that person. _

To simply smile, sincerely, but Aichi notices him too, once he's done picking up his luggage, turns around.

Their gazes meet for a second.

Aichi's eyes are a shade of  _ explosive  _ blue.

 

The young boy is the first to react, overjoyed, and it's been so long, much too long ; his heart burst with joy when Aichi starts running toward him – as fast as he could, dragging his luggage behind – but he doesn't move. He just waits, gracefully, for Aichi to reach him.

There's nothing and everything to say, at the same time.

It's the very definition of perfection, from the way he looks to the way he feels – an harmonious, one-of-a-kind moment of his existence, so unique he forgets, to say something, too busy contemplating,  _ enjoying  _ the warmth in his chest.

 

\- Hi, Aichi declares after a while, to break out the ice.

\- H-hi, he manages.

His voice sounds weird, somewhat out of place – he's not quite sure, if he's showing his charming side or the pathetic one, but it's okay. Being with Aichi was about trying as hard as he could.

( _ Your efforts shine through _ , his lord has confessed, lovingly, during one of their late night calls, a sentence he remembers.)

\- Did you have a good flight ?

He curses himself for being so incredibly banal, when he add anticipated this moment for so long.

\- It was nice, the young boy answer, smiling softly.

Aichi's doing it on purpose – idly chatting, while his eyes are somewhere else entirely, he feels him staring dreamingly at his face ( _ yes, for him too – the real thing was much better than any selfie, ever).  _ It's almost playful on his part, to avoid saying anything meaningful, and maybe it's too early for « I love you », he thinks. The meaningless chatter was better.

They needed time to adapt to each other's presence again.

And so what, if the conversation is just filler – so much more is unsaid, between them, in subtle body langage, in the way they're just casually orbiting around each others. He adapts to Aichi's movement, and the young boy, in exchange, keeps getting nearer, so much they're soon standing within – within hugging distance. It's a dream – he gives up on trying to find words to express himself. It's easier to just  _ do  _ what he wants, what his love dictates him to.

He takes Aichi's hand and lifts it to his mouths level, but the boy pulls it away, entertwining his fingers with his. The smile on the corner of his lips is somewhat mischevious – he's not sure his heart has ever beaten so fast. All around them, other couples, families, lonely people, are walking without paying attention to them. It's a peculiar sensation, to be alone with Aichi, the whole world staring through them as if they didn't even exist. No one to get in the way, and Aichi's beautiful eyes are staring right into his, ignoring their surrounding. He feels realer – as if his gaze was enough to make him gain consistance, to make him shine, like a raw diamond in the divine light. Almost unconsciously, he starts smiling to, like a joyful imbecile. There's nothing more for him to desire – he couldn't possible get closer to him now that Aichi's heart was so close to his. He looks at his lips for a second, but brushes off the thought.

\- Olivier.

He wonders what more he needs to do – Aichi's tone is gentle and kind, as usual, princely, as always when he adresses his knight. Inviting – there's no forcefulness, only peaceful strength. It's pleasing. He had asked himself, several times, if all the qualities he attributed to his lord were real and not just a deformation of his imagination – it was enjoyable, to find them all here. He really was as perfect and unique as he remembered.

He waits for the order – but it doesn't come.

\- You have my permission, Aichi says instead, holding back a laugh – the princely act was a little hard to maintain for him.

He was only doing this to help his stupid knight let go of his doubts – hand kisses were fine, graceful and lovely, but such an important reunion asked for more. It takes a while for him to understand – he stares into Aichi's eyes, unsure, until his smiles blows away his doubts.

He puts his finger behind Aichi's neck and pulls him in for a kiss – softly, ignoring his pounding heart, to concentrate on his lord's perfect lips, perfect everything, and to remember his intention. He wanted to show Aichi the world, the universe. To kiss him like nobody had ever kissed him before, and it's silly, stupidly romantic of him, but he focuses on all the love he feels for him, when he tastes his lips and his breath, eyes half-closed, until he feels confident enough to get passionate, his fingers digging deeper into Aichi's skins as he lets himself go.

Maybe it's the last time – maybe it's just the first one, but he had to do something special to mark the beginning of  _ forever. _

 

When it's over – they take a step back from each other, and he has the surprise to see that Aichi is laughing. Not mocking him – but laughing to his heart's content.

\- I was right to think you'd be a good kisser, he says, inbetween giggles.

\- I… did my best…

\- You did well, Aichi reassures him. Very well. Though I expect you to do better next time, off course.

He's almost ready to protest, to assert the fact that, off course, this  _ subpar  _ kiss wasn't the best he had to offer – until he notices that the young boy is still smiling, somewhat mockingly.

It's adorable, how Aichi tries to balance between seriousness – for him, because he's too strict and unable to free himself from the knightly dynamics he loved, and Aichi was trying to take part in that, still, even if he wanted to do nothing but to laugh.

Laugh, because he was laughable in his  _ cute  _ old-fashionned habits, and he doesn't mind being ridiculous, if that was the kind of ridiculousness Aichi loved.

\- Will you stop mocking me and let me carry you lugage now ? He asks, exasperated after a while.

\- Sure… let me just do something first.

He pats his shoulder, softly, before taking out his phone, moves away and points to the thing at him.

\- Is that for one of your snapchat friends ? He asks as he starts posing for the picture.

He gives Aichi his best expression, the same one he had on his official vanguard posters – sure of himself, challenging the person watching him with his most defiant gaze.

\- Snapchat ? You're funny…

It's a bit condescending, but he decides to ignore it– sometimes, Aichi was a bit overconfident, but he had reasons to. After all – he was there to make his every desires come true.

\- This one is for myself only, his lord concludes with a smile.

 

( _ The picture is beautiful _

_ but not quite as beautiful as the moment _ .)

  
  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading !   
> I apologize for what I guess will be numerous typos, I got too lazy to correct them all and I hope you'll indulge me as a (tired) foreign writer... anyway ! This is part of my fic trade with my pal Lev, and I gotta say this was tons of fun to work on this so I'll be happy if anyone else gets to enjoy it as well.


End file.
